Frightened

I know
I know...
Men have fears too
He hasn't expressed it yet
But he's petrified of what I may do
Pulls me in to push me out
Back and forth like a fool
Battling doubts
Only committed to bickering about rejecting titles
So he calls me nothing
I am merely Sonya
His potential everything, his for now something, but his I revert to nothing so I can protect my feelings
And I protect his vanity by quietly abiding
But I know
I know...
Because once I begin to become unattached
He relentlessly panics and retaliates with mass messages
This reversal takes place during pivotal moments
I am sought out by another and his radar is sensitive
A sixth sense he has picked up through experiences
Somehow he wins me over
And the same complaints I publicly made about him?
They're curved into infinite compliments
In my head my friends will never understand this bond we break and mend
Because they will never fathom how weak he is
But I know
I know...
Fragile to love's concept
A coward at pursuing relationships
Frail with attempting to keep his options disclosed to one person
I may be that woman for him
And he knows...
He knows
But he's afraid.

I see you family...good shit! You all have something special. Shout out to my big bro Rod. Already-

League

HI

So as mentioned earlier...went to Brooklyn Bowl with G. Alexander and it was great. Have a lil vid, nothing crazy. I got bogged down with music choice so I used concert performances, which turned out to be fun to play around with.

Daydreams...

I have always had a tendency to zone out pretty often. But as of late, I have found myself day dreaming more and more. Maybe it is because I have so much going on right now. And if it's not written all over my face, I wish someone could see what I see...



Hello World-
League

Reality

Lost, I hope I find myself,
Dream chasing, Chasing dreams running outta breath with every step that I take left-

Right, left which way should I go when the fork come?

Trying to make it there before my deathbed-

Never sleeping reason I be yawning so much, arms stretched to the sky got me reaching for the stars go-

Is what them voices in my mind say,

Boy you gonna make it keep on going what my mom say-

That's what keeps me driving,

Forgive me but I'm doing it the highway-

Hollow walls, blackberry, laptop, ipod, plus its only me in my place-

Opportunity is at the door all up in my face,

And amidst the things in my way..........I can see it..

I spoke with G.Alexander earlier this week--he reminded what this was all about. For that, I'm grateful....

--Tre DeJean

Mike

We love you Mike. R.I.P.

Second To One

You’re second best
Silver medal
How could you settle?
How could you meddle?
With such a happy couple
Comfortable with interrupting their supper
His late night meetings
Excuses for her wonder
You partially own the evenings
Wake up alone to suffer
Possess nothing in the mornings
Other, than long-filled days of mourning plunder
All the while knowing
You will never possess his heart wholly
Repercussions of Manipulating the holy
Sanctity of their marriage but you’re selfish
Emotions are uncontrolled
So you take the backseat to his life as he cheats
His wife may know something but you risk it because your attention seeks
Undoubtedly
But doubt this one thing
When he says he will leave
Because the continuation of this “fling”
Has gone on for over a year yet there's a consistent lack in him committing
You are the problem behind their marriage breaking
And their baby carriage is pushed by two hands instead of four
The time adored, you long for more
So you compromise lunch breaks to turn knobs on new hotel doors
Pay the stays, left ignored
One day you checked his phone
His other half is at home
She sent a text saying it was the best sex they had right before he embarked himself in her presence
She knew she basked in her residue and scent
Completely stripped of self respect
I will never again risk my worth for a married man


From an outsider looking in...I took the perspective of a mistress in distress. I was sitting one day and just thought about scenarios I haven't written about involving situations I have never been in. More like a challenge posed to myself to see if I can write an out of body experience and have it be realistic enough to relate. Hope you enjoyed it.